Thursday, July 31, 2014 "I Can't Talk. What is This Mindset Called?"

Thursday, July 31, 2014
Week: Summer
Songs to Remember: #2014POINT1 - SHIMMIXES

        This is why I don't want to go on Instagram but then I do and I'm like "I should not have gone on Instagram". And then my day just goes meh.

        So, today's July 31st. Tomorrow will be August and by that time, prepare for the "summer goes by so fast" and "I don't want to go back to school" posts on Facenovel, Instagram, and whatever social media there is. And, I'd like to address something that I wanted to talk about for a long time but I got kinda lazy.

        About a few months ago (I think), while on the internet browser on my Nintendo DSI (which was my only source of mobile whatever) and just plain typing on Google about what was on my mind, or my problems, and see what other people are going through. Or to just find some advice or the similarities between other people's lives and mine. I don't think I do this anymore, I'm just pre-occupied with watching shows and movies at night.

        I searched up "I can't talk". Because, well, I really can't talk. I can type, but I can't talk. I type as if I'm talking, but in reality, I don't really know how to talk. So, this site comes up called "PsychCentral" which includes a segment called "Ask the Therapist". And there was this user (anonymous person, they didn't give their name) who told about how he "can't talk". I was like "Oh hey, that's just like me". I read on (he wrote like 5 paragraphs about how he's not able to talk to anyone) and I was like "Oh hey, that is just like me". Like, the similarities between that person and me are like, way too similar.

        In one of his paragraphs (I'll refer to the person as a he, since it'll sound better than saying "They" for everything), he talks about how he can't talk, even in his own home. He goes on describing how whenever his dad comes into room, he gets in a bad mood, even though his dad does nothing. And when his family is eating dinner, he waits until everyone's done eating to go eat. Just, like, me.

        This person and I have basically the same lives. We both are on the computer everyday, get in a bad mood whenever our dads come in our rooms, eat by ourselves, and of course, can't talk. As that person had stated, "I speak fluent english but I just have this mind freeze and sudden change of emotions to bad moods that stops my conversation and changes my behavior." Seriously, we are too alike, down to the smallest detail.

        Me (and the person) have both searched up stuff about depression, and we both can't relate to any of them. We both have the same mindsets which are fairly different from everyone else's. As the person had said, "What is this mindset called?"

        So yeah, just something really cool and coincidental. Not sure when it was posted, I think it was 2013. The person's also in a University, as they said in their question. The therapist said it's a combination of social anxiety and depression, and I'm like, "Ehhhh", I mean I guess. I wouldn't really describe this mindset "social anxiety" or "depression". More like, "social depression" heh, or something.

        Anyways, tomorrow is August, I'll be picking up my registration papers early in the morning, f***ing 18 days until school starts, my hair's short, I share the same life as another person, and I'll be watching more Watamote and "The Breakfast Club" tonight. On my phone. Here's the url to the question if you want to read it all:

http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/05/25/cant-talk-to-anyone/

        And, well, see you tomorrow I guess.