Thursday, May 26, 2016 "My Best."

Thursday, May 26, 2016
Week: 41
Songs to Remember: Body Lotion - Sleepy

        So it's 2:01 AM, earlier than what I thought I would end my studying on. I could continue, like, finding more practice questions to answer, but, it's not really helping, heh.

        And yes, today was the last "normal" school day for the school-year. It's difficult to take in the moments due to the stress of shit like, making sure I don't fail English and all that. It sucks, but, this is part of the experience, right? I sure wish it wasn't. Also why did I choose to do Digital Art to replace AP Stats? Because I'm planning on majoring in graphic design, that's why.

        The art direction. Might be difficult to find a job with this, but, at least it's something digital, so, there's always a chance. And let's be honest, I've done "graphic design" shit since like, holy hell, for years, like, ever since I discovered YouTube. I remember looking up so many tutorials on making YouTube backgrounds, that was like, I was obsessed with it, because, it's a personal thing, I can personalize my background, make it anything I want.

        With that amount of creative freedom, I spent a lot of time on it. I wish I still had those files so I can take a look at 'em again. Anyways, enough talk about shit that ain't really relevant now, time to talk about what I did to get myself here in front of my PC at 2:08 AM on a Thursday night (or now, morning) before the final exam that will determine whether I waste time or not.

        Psych, my group-mates and I finished up our poster, we're good. Luckily we didn't have to do much shit, so. I noticed that in the class, like for tomorrow, I won't really be saying my good-byes to people. Like, maybe one, just because she's in KDT and a senior and will be going to a college out of state or something. But really, there's nobody I really interacted with.

        I took AP Psych because it was one of the easier AP classes, which in my opinion, yeah, it's true. I didn't choose to take it to meet new people. It would've been cool, yeah, to do so, but it didn't. And guess what? It didn't fucking matter. I got my grade, uhhh, and that's it. Boom.

        English, that's another story. Way different story. If there was a class that was more challenging than regular English III, but not as hard as my teacher's Honors English, I'd take it. Sadly, there isn't. I started reading Catcher again from start to finish, from 8:30 PM to 10:00 PM. I went through the first couple chapters of Gatsby, aaand lost interest, compared to Catcher. Luckily, 50% of the test is on Catcher, 30% is on Gatsby. 10% is on vocabulary, which I got covered, 5% on style, and 5% on grammar.

        All I'm worried about are the short-answer shit, because that ain't based on chance, not like a 1-in-4 chance, it's skill. As long as I do the most craziest interpretations, making sure I can make the teacher go "Ohhh, never noticed that," I'll be good. 'Course, I'm not really sure what the short-answers will be, so, can't say for sure it'll work. Apparently the final is 45 questions, but will take us around an hour and 30 to do, just because we gotta read passages.

        Never in my life would I have re-read a book twice, until now. Umm, so yeah I read the book, I prayed to the lord that I retain my knowledge on Gatsby (plus I did practice questions for it). As for grammar and style, I did a tiny bit of review for mood and tone. I did practice questions for Catcher, and that's about it. It did take me from 8:30 PM to 2:00 AM, so, a good, 5+ hours. I took around a 20 minute break in total, and that's for brushing my teeth and like, getting bed-ready.

        I'm just hoping, just hoping. Anyways, back to the day. Bio was what'd you expect: essentially nothing in class. I could've worked on math work, but I wanted to spend the time just, taking in the atmosphere, and talking to Ct who will be graduating. I received a text from Lt suddenly at the beginning of period. Yeah, I was surprised too. She asked me if her textbook was still in my locker. I realized "Oh shit, it has been in there for a while." I told her I could go check.

        And yep, it was. A U.S History textbook. I told her that I'd bring it to her at the end of 3rd period instead of having her go and get it herself. In class we watched "Shaolin Soccer," a classic. Ct was, well, talking with the dude behind me. The bell rang and I went down the steps, Lt was with her cousin, I handed her her book, she was like "Thanks so much" and I was like "Hey, no problem." I wanted to talk to her again, but she was already in a conversation with her cousin.

        It felt weird. Like was it my fault, was it her fault that shit got boring? It doesn't matter though, all I want is to end shit on a good note. So, tomorrow I'll talk to her a bit after the English final. Yeah, yeah, it's not like I'll never see again, she could be in my Anatomy class next year, but still. I wanna leave a positive end impression, and if she doesn't like it, hey, just reaffirms the theory that it was her fault, not mine.

        Oh and one thing I wanted to say about Bio: the teacher robbed us. Of our grade. This was her first year teaching AP Bio, and guess what? It's most likely her last year as well, just, teaching in general. At least for a while. In the school newspaper they handed out today, it said that she was going to be taking a break from teaching, or something similar. I was like "Wow. So you come here, choose to teach AP Bio and fail at it, then run away at the end of it all, while we're the ones who had to suffer." It would've been a lot, I would've understood had she not bail out, like, stop teaching, heh, and the fact that she could not get a 100% on the AP Bio final, of which she had majored in Bio and taught Bio for 10+ years, and, it was a fucking High school AP Bio final in which she helped create the test itself. Still salty about that shit, heh.

        But besides that, math was next. I got a boatload of work, like, literal review worksheets. It's due on the day of the final, which fortunately, is on Tuesday. It's rather unfortunate for 1st and 2nd period because they got their finals tomorrow, and if one of her classes is Honors Pre-cal, then they gotta do all this work by tomorrow. Yikes. It's not necessarily difficult, just, a lot. Umm, but yeah, I'm not sweating it too hard for math, just, holding off on work 'till Sunday night or Monday since there's no school.

        Lunch, I thought Ag and Jk were aware that Ek doesn't like them or something, but apparently they didn't. Ek was not standing with them in line for lunch, I came over from math with DrewN and Jk asked me "Hey, does Ek hates us or something?" I tried to tell him in a whisper so that Ek wouldn't hear. Uhh, I basically told him the premise, continued giving him the details on messenger, privately. I told him all I knew, which was, Ek apparently doesn't want hang with the rest of the cast, yadda yadda, she said she wants to be separate for the rest of the year, umm, she did say she wanted a game night, so, I don't know. And also for him to not tell Ek that i told him.

        I gave him permission to tell Ag and DrewN about the situation, hopefully, this Ek shit drama will go away, uhh, because I'm not looking forward to babysitting. Yeah, I told Jk that the only reason I'm hanging out with her is to accompany her 'cause I feel sorry for her, that she apparently doesn't like you guys anymore or something or whatever her reason is. It feels like a debt, a favor, because if it weren't for her inviting me into that room in the library during math tutoring in the summer, I would've never had become so close to people I do now. So, I do owe her something.

        So, uh, yeah, History was just some in-class bulkwork, nothing to worry about, we watched a film based on the 4th plane of 9/11, pretty suspenseful. Chinese, we sat back, relaxed, and watched people present their final projects, my group did as well. My group partner, the one who sits next to me, said yesterday "I'ma miss sitting with you guys." And honestly, contradicting my initial thoughts of being in this final group, that was what I thought too today. Although it's not the last time, you get what I mean.

        And yeah, went home, ate, I did take my nap because seriously, all this stress, I don't know what to make of it. It's just fucking bullshit. I know, nothing comparable to what comes next, but you get what I mean right now. Ummm, hey, fortunately, I get to spend time with KDT tomorrow (hopefully) and Ec (hopefully) as I told him to come over to Fanime and just sneak in without a badge. KDT's gonna perform, I'ma full weab it up, just for funsies, and it'll just be a great time, great reward for doing all I could for English, whether I'm the father or not, heh.

        Practice for "Let Me Sarang You" (by the way, Dn, Mt, Ln, and Be are all part of our dance, and I'm doing the role of J.I.Z. Yeah, him, heh) and "Drip Drop" will have to be for maybe, Monday night or some shit, maybe Saturday night. 'Cause I know I'll be saving this math work for 'till the end of time, might be enveloped with Fanime hype that I procrastinate too much.

        So anyways, it's 2:42 AM now, I'm exhausted, I kinda wanna play Isaac but at the same time I wanna sleep. 1st period will probably be just me studying for the onslaught, no kidding. But whatever. I'll do a quick round of Isaac, 'cause fuck it. See ya.