Saturday, June 21, 2014 "Asian Teen Problems."

Saturday, June 21, 2014
Week: Summer
Songs to Remember: When I'm Small - Phantogram

        I am not looking forward to waking up early tomorrow. And my parents are telling me to sleep early tonight because we're going to f***ing Yosemite.

        We could have gone to so many other places, but apparently they picked Yosemite. For no reason either, just a random "Hey, let's go to Yosemite". It's it's it's not even something that's like "Oooh" or "Aaahh", it's a park.

        My mom even wants me to bring the camera to take pictures and I'm like "There's a camera on your phone". My mom doesn't even use any features on her phone and only use it to call people. Once it's like July, I'll finally be getting my own phone, without having to "borrow" other people's phones like my mom always makes me to.

        I'm 15, turning 16 in December, and I have yet to own a phone, even a simple flip-phone to make calls, like for my mom to pick me up if she forgets or if I get lost or anything. My mom makes this excuse to prevent me from having a phone by telling me to borrow other people's phones. I can't continue to keep borrowing people's phones, mom.

        One time, my parents and I walked into this restaurant and we saw these kids with their parents. They were like 5, and even they had phones. Like, what the f***. My parents' phone contract ends in July, and my mom said she'll finally open up another phone line for me to have a phone. She said she'll be giving me her phone and she'll be getting a Samsung whatever.

        Her phone is an LG Cookie by the way, and I don't even think it even has Wi-Fi. What's the point of the phone being a touch screen when there are no downloadable apps or web browsing access. One time in Drawing class, the teacher asked us to get out our phones and research up this type of drawing technique.

        Everyone got out their phones and started searching away. I just sat there and my teacher was like "Does anyone not have a phone?" I was the only one to raise my hand, although barely raising it. My teacher then lent me her laptop in order for me to research it. One time in Geography class (and 8th grade English class, Oh so many times where I needed to have a f***ing phone), the teacher had notes written on the board and allowed us to take a picture of it with our smart-phones. I for one, don't have a phone, so I had to write it all down manually. All of it. And it was a hell of a lot of notes.

        I feel privileged for when the teacher brings in chrome-books for us to use, so that I don't get left out of having no access to wireless communication. My mom doesn't use her phone to do anything besides calling, so why would she need to get a new phone and have me take hers.

        And DON'T even tell me "Oh, at least you're going to get to have a phone while I'm sitting here starving and working as much as I can to affor-". Stop. In the society, region, and where I am located, expectations are set to a degree. My family is middle class, barely, in which we could afford phones, and like, internet. I mean, I'd even pay for the internet bills and soon-to-be phone bills. I'd pay for all of that. I'd happily work for it.

        Having already bad social skills, it's difficult being able to do things a teen like me should be able to do. Like, hanging out with friends, having a curfew, communication, wireless communication, freedom, and some independence. Don't pull the "Kids in Africa" bulls*** like my mom does. Just because there are problems, doesn't mean it has anything to do with us.

        I could go into stupid s*** like the economy, education, money, and other s*** like that, but I don't want to talk for a million years. Controversial topics are what keeps interest, because people say what they believe and not all of it is the same.

        Besides my dad being annoying by waking me up every night, asking unnecessary questions, and acting like I'm still 5, or my mom who doesn't know the social standpoint of her son, or me who continues arguing with myself in my head, I don't know what to do.

        I have contemplated about running away sometimes, but I never do it. If I'm staring at the face of death, I'd accept it. I ain't afraid to die. Dying would seem like a release from all the problems, but most of the time, it ain't the answer to them. No, I would never kill myself, I think suicide is pretty stupid. People who commit suicide are the ones arguing with themselves in their head, and often give up those arguments to themselves.

        I watched a movie online with my cousin and we played Star Wars Battlefront II. Is that good enough for ya'll? Good, see you tomorrow.