Sunday, November 8, 2015
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: What's Wrong With Me - Toppdogg
It seems that nearing the end of the year bad things always happen (say, for example, from the past two years). Hopefully this year will break that trend.
So, yesterday was fairly emotional. And for some reason,whenever I feel emotional to that extent, I always search up what I'm feeling or what's happening to Google, and finding Yahoo! Answers of the things I typed. This just assures me that "Hey, I'm not the only one who's experiencing this" to combat my average teen mentality.
One of the things I found, suggested that I should not listen to my parents arguing, because that could lead to bad things, and to just take my mind off of it, do something else like play video games. And uh, that's exactly what I did. Played Black Ops 3 with my cousin up 'till nighttime, continuing that today. And this is ain't the first time where I succumb to my addictions. It's 12:32 AM and I did not do any work today, besides math. But, hearing that shit ain't due TOMORROW, I'm doing it tomorrow.
And so, I got things to talk about, with Lt. Umm, I feel that I've already talked much about her already, don't wanna do that again. Because, fucking, Andrew. Me. I'm talking to myself right now. You've been through this, this kind of thinking before. These emotions. I mean, that's sorta one of the reasons why you made this whole blog shit right? So use that experience to grow and take advantage of it. DO DIFFERENTLY.
Okay, okay. Got it, me. That's actually- I never thought about that. 'Tll now. Kinda forgot what I learned from the past, 2-3 years. If it starts to seem boring, put some effort in and do shit differently, get excited. AND GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS.
I needed that, Drew. Alright, that's enough self-motiviation for now, I'll be having fun reading all this in the future, heh. See ya.
Monday, November 9, 2015
Saturday, November 7, 2015
Saturday, November 7, 2015 "I Love You."
Saturday, November 7, 2015
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: I Wonder Why - Dion and the Belmonts
I overheard my parents fighting today. Didn't really had to try that hard though because they're loud enough that I can hear them from in my room.
This is a honest-to-God letter post about both my dad and my mom, whom I in all honesty, believe that I have not tried to interact much with lately. What's to blame? My insecurity, laziness, tiredness, and just outright because I'm a teen, where I have the mentality that "nobody understands me, what I'm going through, how I have the hardest life right now."
Both my parents have come from long ways to get where they are now, here, in American, where I can have the best life possible. They seen and experienced with troubles I cannot even imagine. My dad, I've seen photos of him working as a rickshaw driver back in Vietnam. There was one time, back at our old, old house where he showed me pictures he took back in Vietnam. There was a picture a young guy whom I did not recognize. My dad said this was a guy he gave bread to each day because he was hungry and poor. He said that guy later on committed suicide.
My mom grew up in a family with around 8 other siblings. Her parents, especially her father, had high expectations for her to do well in school. Her family was also scraping to get by. I don't exactly know when or where my parents met. I'm thinking it was when they were in America, when my mom told me this story of how my dad took my mom out to Mountain Mike's Pizza when they were dating.
Living in America, my mom got a job working at a beauty salon. My dad, he's worked in an industrial gas supplying company for around 15 years, ever since I was born. My mom quit her job and has ever since stayed home, taking care of me. Both of my parents never attended college.
My parents got an apartment, and soon got a house. Just a small 1-story house in a quiet neighborhood. We stayed there until I finished 4th grade, and then we moved. I still remember everything, from the stories my mom told me, waking up early in the morning for school, sittigng in front of the heater, watching Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network while drinking my milk, progressing from sleeping in the same bed as my mom ,watching The Brady Bunch on T.V, to having 2 separate beds, to a bunk bed. I remember me playing in my dad's room, him showing me the basics on using a computer, how to turn it on, when we went to watch Monster House and Star Wars Episode 3 in theaters together, when we went on bike rides around our neighborhood and at my school. I remember all of that and even more. When I told my mom I wanted to go visit our old, old house again (this was at around 2010), she said we couldn't, because the sight of the house will bring back memories and make her cry (in a good way).
As a family, we've reached bumpy roads at the second house we've moved to. I didn't like leaving my friends, didn't like the people at my new school, the administration was outright racist, poor funding, dangerous neighborhood, it was just bad overall. I got into trouble with the school somehow, there was police involved, my parents did not like it one bit. We moved shortly after I finished 5th grade there. And now here, in the house we've been living in for more than 5 years now. That's a really long time if you think about it, from 6th grade, all the way now to 11th. A lot of things happened in just 5 years.
We've made friends with the neighbors, I finished elementary school, went on to middle school, finished that, and now, trekking along through high school. Over time, my parents, they've gotten stressed out, with, all the things I have to get involved in. My mom drives me to school at 7:30 AM in the morning, buying school supplies, by dad has to pay for my SAT, drive me to and from school events, or to hang out with friends on the weekends. I'm in high school, I should be trying to be independent by now, that my parents shouldn't have to worry about all this, but apparently, this is actually all too much work for just one person, and it sorta becomes my parents' responsibilities as well.
During my parent's fight today, about an hour ago, this was the line that triggered me the most: "Just say it. Just the say the word, and I'll take Andrew and raise him myself." That brings me to tears just by remembering how my mom said it. It breaks my heart. I was worried that my dad would snap and say okay to a divorce, but, thank goodness he didn't. I don't ever, want my parents' arguments to go to the extremities of something like that.
What would break me the most would not be getting rejected by the girl I like, failing all my classes, losing my friends, or losing relatives, but losing my parents. Without them, I wouldn't have been able to meet my friends, enjoy being around my relatives whenever we visit, or even, had the idea to start this blog to gather my thoughts. I've heard all their arguments, from house to house, school to school, from age 1 to age 16. I have thought about suicide and running away before. I have never attempted either of those things. For running away, it's because it's not permanent like suicide, and I want people to realize my presence and when I'm gone. For suicide, I'm too cowardly for that, I'd be too scared to commit to it. But worst of all, it would do more bad than good. It would devastate my parents.
So, to you, my parents, this is what I have to say as of now. Mom, even though I never really show expression or enthusiasm when you do, or try harder in my classes, or want a career in the medical field, or, try to speak more Vietnamese, the first language I've learned, I still love you. I always have, I always will. I love you, mom.
Dad. I'm sorry for neglecting to talk to you. It's just because I'm tired when coming home from school and your constant questions annoy me when I'm tired. But now that I've actually looked at it from your perspective, you're really just trying to interact with your son, even if it's just a "How was school? How much homework do you have today? Keep up the good work, it's almost the weekend." You've hugged me ever since I was little. You still give me kisses. What any other kid would give to have a dad like you. I love you, daddy. Even if I don't show it, even if I don't say thank you, I mean it. I love you.
After the 16 years, soon to be 17 years, of us being together, through all the arguments, through all the fun experiences, to all the things trying to separate us, I'm glad that we're still together. I love and appreciate what you've done for me. So to my mom and my dad, please don't divorce. I love you.
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: I Wonder Why - Dion and the Belmonts
I overheard my parents fighting today. Didn't really had to try that hard though because they're loud enough that I can hear them from in my room.
This is a honest-to-God letter post about both my dad and my mom, whom I in all honesty, believe that I have not tried to interact much with lately. What's to blame? My insecurity, laziness, tiredness, and just outright because I'm a teen, where I have the mentality that "nobody understands me, what I'm going through, how I have the hardest life right now."
Both my parents have come from long ways to get where they are now, here, in American, where I can have the best life possible. They seen and experienced with troubles I cannot even imagine. My dad, I've seen photos of him working as a rickshaw driver back in Vietnam. There was one time, back at our old, old house where he showed me pictures he took back in Vietnam. There was a picture a young guy whom I did not recognize. My dad said this was a guy he gave bread to each day because he was hungry and poor. He said that guy later on committed suicide.
My mom grew up in a family with around 8 other siblings. Her parents, especially her father, had high expectations for her to do well in school. Her family was also scraping to get by. I don't exactly know when or where my parents met. I'm thinking it was when they were in America, when my mom told me this story of how my dad took my mom out to Mountain Mike's Pizza when they were dating.
Living in America, my mom got a job working at a beauty salon. My dad, he's worked in an industrial gas supplying company for around 15 years, ever since I was born. My mom quit her job and has ever since stayed home, taking care of me. Both of my parents never attended college.
My parents got an apartment, and soon got a house. Just a small 1-story house in a quiet neighborhood. We stayed there until I finished 4th grade, and then we moved. I still remember everything, from the stories my mom told me, waking up early in the morning for school, sittigng in front of the heater, watching Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network while drinking my milk, progressing from sleeping in the same bed as my mom ,watching The Brady Bunch on T.V, to having 2 separate beds, to a bunk bed. I remember me playing in my dad's room, him showing me the basics on using a computer, how to turn it on, when we went to watch Monster House and Star Wars Episode 3 in theaters together, when we went on bike rides around our neighborhood and at my school. I remember all of that and even more. When I told my mom I wanted to go visit our old, old house again (this was at around 2010), she said we couldn't, because the sight of the house will bring back memories and make her cry (in a good way).
As a family, we've reached bumpy roads at the second house we've moved to. I didn't like leaving my friends, didn't like the people at my new school, the administration was outright racist, poor funding, dangerous neighborhood, it was just bad overall. I got into trouble with the school somehow, there was police involved, my parents did not like it one bit. We moved shortly after I finished 5th grade there. And now here, in the house we've been living in for more than 5 years now. That's a really long time if you think about it, from 6th grade, all the way now to 11th. A lot of things happened in just 5 years.
We've made friends with the neighbors, I finished elementary school, went on to middle school, finished that, and now, trekking along through high school. Over time, my parents, they've gotten stressed out, with, all the things I have to get involved in. My mom drives me to school at 7:30 AM in the morning, buying school supplies, by dad has to pay for my SAT, drive me to and from school events, or to hang out with friends on the weekends. I'm in high school, I should be trying to be independent by now, that my parents shouldn't have to worry about all this, but apparently, this is actually all too much work for just one person, and it sorta becomes my parents' responsibilities as well.
During my parent's fight today, about an hour ago, this was the line that triggered me the most: "Just say it. Just the say the word, and I'll take Andrew and raise him myself." That brings me to tears just by remembering how my mom said it. It breaks my heart. I was worried that my dad would snap and say okay to a divorce, but, thank goodness he didn't. I don't ever, want my parents' arguments to go to the extremities of something like that.
What would break me the most would not be getting rejected by the girl I like, failing all my classes, losing my friends, or losing relatives, but losing my parents. Without them, I wouldn't have been able to meet my friends, enjoy being around my relatives whenever we visit, or even, had the idea to start this blog to gather my thoughts. I've heard all their arguments, from house to house, school to school, from age 1 to age 16. I have thought about suicide and running away before. I have never attempted either of those things. For running away, it's because it's not permanent like suicide, and I want people to realize my presence and when I'm gone. For suicide, I'm too cowardly for that, I'd be too scared to commit to it. But worst of all, it would do more bad than good. It would devastate my parents.
So, to you, my parents, this is what I have to say as of now. Mom, even though I never really show expression or enthusiasm when you do, or try harder in my classes, or want a career in the medical field, or, try to speak more Vietnamese, the first language I've learned, I still love you. I always have, I always will. I love you, mom.
Dad. I'm sorry for neglecting to talk to you. It's just because I'm tired when coming home from school and your constant questions annoy me when I'm tired. But now that I've actually looked at it from your perspective, you're really just trying to interact with your son, even if it's just a "How was school? How much homework do you have today? Keep up the good work, it's almost the weekend." You've hugged me ever since I was little. You still give me kisses. What any other kid would give to have a dad like you. I love you, daddy. Even if I don't show it, even if I don't say thank you, I mean it. I love you.
After the 16 years, soon to be 17 years, of us being together, through all the arguments, through all the fun experiences, to all the things trying to separate us, I'm glad that we're still together. I love and appreciate what you've done for me. So to my mom and my dad, please don't divorce. I love you.
Friday, November 6, 2015 "Feeling All Around."
Friday, November 6, 2015
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: Everybody's Circulation - TMABird
Damn. Wasn't the season finale I was expecting, but, I'll take it. Still sorta unclear what to do with the Lt story.
Psychology, man, what a shitty-ass "fun Friday" which sometimes continues beyond Friday, like today. We were in groups, again, and we had like, different stations to do. It sorta like, experiencing age and shit, just random shit like that. For our group, we first did this activity where we put in earplugs, wear scratched glasses, and read Dr.Seuss books to imitate what being elderly feels like. Sorta.
Worst part of it all: we had to walk, hunched, as if we had a cane, slowly, to the library steps straight across from the classroom. FUCK, YOU. It was literally like 54 degrees in the morning, and of course, our activity involved going outside. And there's like, 5 other stations, we only got through ours and one other station before the bell rang.
*sigh* Anyways, English, I was hoping we wouldn't be doing the essay, but, alas, we did. Fortunately, it was to be typed on Chromebooks, so that was my playing field. And thankfully it was expected to be short because it was in-class and timed. For the prompt, it was a random selection between 3, which we got to choose, randomly of course. Not bad, talk about how Hester is a strong female character, aka, explain if the novel was written in a feminist view or not. Did the 2:1 ratio, I was scared for the time because I needed quotes, I don't remember where page numbers are, so I made sure not to spend too much time on finding 'em.
I did finish on time though, so, not bad, I'll take it. And, there's not take-home essay, thank god. Either that, or he's giving it to us next week, in which I will be like "Fuck." Lt and I, I don't know anymore. Like, I'm not sure how SHE feels about us, if that strong connection still holds now from like, a couple months ago. I guess I'm just feeling depressed because our convo's are just talking about school and shit, and how I don't get that burst of excitement whenever I get a text from her.
Never thought I'd have to think this way, I always sorta mocked it back in middle school. And uh, look at me now, heh. Fucking, this shit happens. I could compare it to basically Drake's "Hotline Bling."You used to call me on your cellphone. late night when you need my love, Call me on my cellphone.
Maybe she feels the same way, that she expects me to text her. But, probably just busy with work, like, a lot of work. She still plans to take AP classes next year. And yes, it is confirmed she ain't doing CCOC next year. Ummm, to continue where I left off, I went instead to the L building, and just sat in the depths. By that I mean at the place where many people sit at at the L building. And Lt did pass by, with her other 2 buddies, that one dude that we've gone over, and this one girl. I forgot her name though, I think I saw her name when Lt screenshotted her bootleg math trick that she did to her friend like me.
In my defense, I was studying on my phone. She was there, with her 2 buddies, right next to me, the bell rings, she actually walks with me, up the stairs, to my class. We talk 'bout, you guessed it, classes we'll be taking next year, And still, FUCKING AP's, heh, I don't know if I can handle anymore of this shit. But yeah, now that I remember this moment, it does make me feel better, knowing she, walked with me to the door of my next class when her class was right there.
So I guess, that could work out for me. On Monday I could be like, "Oh hey, you're going to the L building? I need to go there too." And uh, just, see where it goes from there. Alright, enough talk 'bout Lt, moving on. Biology, thank the lord I found the Quizlet flashcards for questions from the giant-ass review sheet. And yes, those exact same questions were on the quiz. Only 5 questions, multiple choice, got a 3/5. Many got 4/5 because of a bootleg trick question, so, not bad. Umm, mostly just review, planning what to do on Monday, also the teacher's birthday today so, there's that.
And, almost forgot to mention, it's my buddy Ac's birthday today, happy birthday to him. I've known him since 6th grade, we don't talk very much, but we've hung out in a group for pretty much all of middle school, and uh, high school's changed, but we still have that sorta connection from the past. Anyways, prime example of AP classes: my Bio teacher talked about suicide rates, how 1/5 of every high school student has thought about attempting suicide. She tells about this dude she knows who's an engineer who works at Amazon. He's interviewed over 500 people, never was he like "Hmmm, what AP classes did this person take?" Made me feel better knowing this will all be just lost in my brain in the future. Just, this, my struggles, heh. But damn, fucking AP classes, Thanks for feeling for us.
Okay, gotta move on because I wanna sleep. Math, the usual. Lunch, the usual. US History, we finished watching the Lusitania. Damn was it a nice movie. I was wondering where they got the budget until I saw the Discovery channel logo. It got really dark after the setup, like, really, really dark and tragic. I really liked it, and the best part of it all: I didn't fall asleep this time. Also, I don't know if I've ever mentioned this but I've been reading this book called "Pay it Forward" during SSR, from our teacher's book collection, and recommended to me by Ky. Almost done with it, pretty good book. Gonna be the first book in many, many years that I've actually read each and every page. The last time was probably the Joy Luck Club, but that doesn't count because I hate that book, heh.
Chinese, yeah that was just, going over the homework, people present their research summaries, all good. Nothing much else to say, except that afterwards, I walked to the dance room to watch people perform for a bit, for KDT, when I ran into Cy and well, Kh. Cy's like, that girl whom is friends with Ls, umm, cut her hair short last year, and uh, was good buddies with Ec. You know. And Kh, the dude who's friends with Ad and Cy, senior, chill dude. They were going somewhere, didn't really hear where, but instead of waiting, I just went along with them.
With what looked like they were going home LOL, it turned out that we went to Kh's house (which was super close to the school, like about a 2 minute walk. We sat on this bench on his front porch, Cy and I, when we see Ls. She comes over, sits down with us, I was like "What a fucking coincidence/ timing." Kh just changed into more comfortable clothes, we went back, it was 3:20 PM by now, but apparently the teacher supervisor wasn't here yet, so, we got a break, heh.
Thought it would start at 3:15 PM, apparently not, stayed 'till 3:45 PM and went home. Why? I was looking forward to playing Black Ops 3, which, I will, tomorrow, thank you dad, heh (my past birthday presents for the last 4 years has been nothing but Call of Duty games. And, including some gifts last year by cool people, like Ek and Yn).I made a commitment because if I were to get this game, the addiction will grow, be unstoppable, good bye to school work. So, I decided I'll play only on weekends, or, if I finish with ALL my work before 7:00 PM. But, for weekends, I'll play for as long as my cousin (whom we haven't really Skyped much. Like, barely. Only the past week or so has he called me. Guess we're just busy with work or something, or at least, I am. Even so, we're still really close) does.
As for online shit, we tried to redo our Google Hangouts thing with my group and I for Chinese, this time one of our members overslept from her nap or something, due to AP and Honors work as a sophomore, so, I understand. So, we're moving it to tomorrow, which is fine. I've been watching Slaydra (azneyeswhitedragon) stream Black Ops 3 for the past day or so. And uh, played a couple League games with my buddy Ec. Our future in the Gold vision looks dim, heh.
Wheeeew. What a fucking post. Was around like, an hour of straight writing. Or at least, 30 minutes. That's- oh shit, almost forgot this bootleg moment. Our English teacher played Chic's "Le Freak" song during the beginning of the period. I was like "Awww, come on man. Savage as fuck yo, heh." Like, damn. And if you don't get it, the song's lyrics is about freaking out, in which, students like us would freak out about doing in-class essays or major works like it. FREAK OUT. Fucking savage.
Alright, enough talking, quality sleep, here I come. Also I'm sick, with a sore throat this whole week, runny nose today. Fuck you cold, and as my best buddy would exclaim, "Fuck this gay Earth!" Anyways, see ya.
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: Everybody's Circulation - TMABird
Damn. Wasn't the season finale I was expecting, but, I'll take it. Still sorta unclear what to do with the Lt story.
Psychology, man, what a shitty-ass "fun Friday" which sometimes continues beyond Friday, like today. We were in groups, again, and we had like, different stations to do. It sorta like, experiencing age and shit, just random shit like that. For our group, we first did this activity where we put in earplugs, wear scratched glasses, and read Dr.Seuss books to imitate what being elderly feels like. Sorta.
Worst part of it all: we had to walk, hunched, as if we had a cane, slowly, to the library steps straight across from the classroom. FUCK, YOU. It was literally like 54 degrees in the morning, and of course, our activity involved going outside. And there's like, 5 other stations, we only got through ours and one other station before the bell rang.
*sigh* Anyways, English, I was hoping we wouldn't be doing the essay, but, alas, we did. Fortunately, it was to be typed on Chromebooks, so that was my playing field. And thankfully it was expected to be short because it was in-class and timed. For the prompt, it was a random selection between 3, which we got to choose, randomly of course. Not bad, talk about how Hester is a strong female character, aka, explain if the novel was written in a feminist view or not. Did the 2:1 ratio, I was scared for the time because I needed quotes, I don't remember where page numbers are, so I made sure not to spend too much time on finding 'em.
I did finish on time though, so, not bad, I'll take it. And, there's not take-home essay, thank god. Either that, or he's giving it to us next week, in which I will be like "Fuck." Lt and I, I don't know anymore. Like, I'm not sure how SHE feels about us, if that strong connection still holds now from like, a couple months ago. I guess I'm just feeling depressed because our convo's are just talking about school and shit, and how I don't get that burst of excitement whenever I get a text from her.
Never thought I'd have to think this way, I always sorta mocked it back in middle school. And uh, look at me now, heh. Fucking, this shit happens. I could compare it to basically Drake's "Hotline Bling."You used to call me on your cellphone. late night when you need my love, Call me on my cellphone.
Maybe she feels the same way, that she expects me to text her. But, probably just busy with work, like, a lot of work. She still plans to take AP classes next year. And yes, it is confirmed she ain't doing CCOC next year. Ummm, to continue where I left off, I went instead to the L building, and just sat in the depths. By that I mean at the place where many people sit at at the L building. And Lt did pass by, with her other 2 buddies, that one dude that we've gone over, and this one girl. I forgot her name though, I think I saw her name when Lt screenshotted her bootleg math trick that she did to her friend like me.
In my defense, I was studying on my phone. She was there, with her 2 buddies, right next to me, the bell rings, she actually walks with me, up the stairs, to my class. We talk 'bout, you guessed it, classes we'll be taking next year, And still, FUCKING AP's, heh, I don't know if I can handle anymore of this shit. But yeah, now that I remember this moment, it does make me feel better, knowing she, walked with me to the door of my next class when her class was right there.
So I guess, that could work out for me. On Monday I could be like, "Oh hey, you're going to the L building? I need to go there too." And uh, just, see where it goes from there. Alright, enough talk 'bout Lt, moving on. Biology, thank the lord I found the Quizlet flashcards for questions from the giant-ass review sheet. And yes, those exact same questions were on the quiz. Only 5 questions, multiple choice, got a 3/5. Many got 4/5 because of a bootleg trick question, so, not bad. Umm, mostly just review, planning what to do on Monday, also the teacher's birthday today so, there's that.
And, almost forgot to mention, it's my buddy Ac's birthday today, happy birthday to him. I've known him since 6th grade, we don't talk very much, but we've hung out in a group for pretty much all of middle school, and uh, high school's changed, but we still have that sorta connection from the past. Anyways, prime example of AP classes: my Bio teacher talked about suicide rates, how 1/5 of every high school student has thought about attempting suicide. She tells about this dude she knows who's an engineer who works at Amazon. He's interviewed over 500 people, never was he like "Hmmm, what AP classes did this person take?" Made me feel better knowing this will all be just lost in my brain in the future. Just, this, my struggles, heh. But damn, fucking AP classes, Thanks for feeling for us.
Okay, gotta move on because I wanna sleep. Math, the usual. Lunch, the usual. US History, we finished watching the Lusitania. Damn was it a nice movie. I was wondering where they got the budget until I saw the Discovery channel logo. It got really dark after the setup, like, really, really dark and tragic. I really liked it, and the best part of it all: I didn't fall asleep this time. Also, I don't know if I've ever mentioned this but I've been reading this book called "Pay it Forward" during SSR, from our teacher's book collection, and recommended to me by Ky. Almost done with it, pretty good book. Gonna be the first book in many, many years that I've actually read each and every page. The last time was probably the Joy Luck Club, but that doesn't count because I hate that book, heh.
Chinese, yeah that was just, going over the homework, people present their research summaries, all good. Nothing much else to say, except that afterwards, I walked to the dance room to watch people perform for a bit, for KDT, when I ran into Cy and well, Kh. Cy's like, that girl whom is friends with Ls, umm, cut her hair short last year, and uh, was good buddies with Ec. You know. And Kh, the dude who's friends with Ad and Cy, senior, chill dude. They were going somewhere, didn't really hear where, but instead of waiting, I just went along with them.
With what looked like they were going home LOL, it turned out that we went to Kh's house (which was super close to the school, like about a 2 minute walk. We sat on this bench on his front porch, Cy and I, when we see Ls. She comes over, sits down with us, I was like "What a fucking coincidence/ timing." Kh just changed into more comfortable clothes, we went back, it was 3:20 PM by now, but apparently the teacher supervisor wasn't here yet, so, we got a break, heh.
Thought it would start at 3:15 PM, apparently not, stayed 'till 3:45 PM and went home. Why? I was looking forward to playing Black Ops 3, which, I will, tomorrow, thank you dad, heh (my past birthday presents for the last 4 years has been nothing but Call of Duty games. And, including some gifts last year by cool people, like Ek and Yn).I made a commitment because if I were to get this game, the addiction will grow, be unstoppable, good bye to school work. So, I decided I'll play only on weekends, or, if I finish with ALL my work before 7:00 PM. But, for weekends, I'll play for as long as my cousin (whom we haven't really Skyped much. Like, barely. Only the past week or so has he called me. Guess we're just busy with work or something, or at least, I am. Even so, we're still really close) does.
As for online shit, we tried to redo our Google Hangouts thing with my group and I for Chinese, this time one of our members overslept from her nap or something, due to AP and Honors work as a sophomore, so, I understand. So, we're moving it to tomorrow, which is fine. I've been watching Slaydra (azneyeswhitedragon) stream Black Ops 3 for the past day or so. And uh, played a couple League games with my buddy Ec. Our future in the Gold vision looks dim, heh.
Wheeeew. What a fucking post. Was around like, an hour of straight writing. Or at least, 30 minutes. That's- oh shit, almost forgot this bootleg moment. Our English teacher played Chic's "Le Freak" song during the beginning of the period. I was like "Awww, come on man. Savage as fuck yo, heh." Like, damn. And if you don't get it, the song's lyrics is about freaking out, in which, students like us would freak out about doing in-class essays or major works like it. FREAK OUT. Fucking savage.
Alright, enough talking, quality sleep, here I come. Also I'm sick, with a sore throat this whole week, runny nose today. Fuck you cold, and as my best buddy would exclaim, "Fuck this gay Earth!" Anyways, see ya.
Friday, November 6, 2015
Thursday, November 5, 2015 "Stand-Still."
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: Don't Flirt - WINNER, Don't Leave - GD&TOP
Holy shit, I went back to look at the career week details (which is next, next week) and saw that on November 20th, there's gonna be a "Professional Gamer/Gaming Industry" coming to visit and talk about their job. I'm like "Daaaamn, I gotta see that. It can either be a pro gamer I know, or Vanderhaar, heh."
So this week, to be honest, I have not been feeling it lately. I haven't even been talking much about Lt because, there's barely anything to talk about. It's sorta dying now, the plot's at a stand-still, no advances, just, shit. Also there's been a ton of work, tests, quizzes, I even received one of my worst scores on a quiz/test that I think I've ever received in my life, heh. If there's one thing I'm grateful for, is the candy that Lt gave me. Bad for my health, yes, but keeps me awake to do shit like, write this.
Psychology, fucking, all I really need to worry about is studying and doing the stupid notes and copying down the answers for the study guide. There's never any homework, projects are just a pain in the ass sometimes (like from the past couple days). Today was just to wrap up presentations, the rest was free time to do shit like study for quotation explications next period.
There's two sides to having my current English teacher. The bad side: he gives a lot of work, a lot of in-depth work, and has high expectations, The good side: if it weren't forme having him as my teacher for 2nd period Honors English, this Lt story arch wouldn't have existed, so there's a definite trade-off there, heh. I didn't really study quotes because it's pretty much impossible to memorize all of 'em. I went to Cliffnotes and Shmoop as my saving graces and studied themes and ways to format my explications. The whole thing was 4 explications, 40 minutes, hand-written. I did not get to finish my 4th explication unfortunately. Fortunately, I'm not the only one.
4 explications with 10 minutes each, I gotta take a minute to remember where it came from, who said, context, etc. Then, plan out what I wanna write about, what theme. Then format and start writing. Really wished we could've typed it, because with the amount of time we're given, it's either quality or penmanship, and I damn well went for quality. Umm, Lt. I'm not sure the direction we're heading to, it's sorta veering off course. When walking to English, she talks about shit that happens in her US History class. After English, she talks about shit that happened in English. And the times that we worked on our poster, she talked about shit OTHER than school.
Definitely an unpredictable person. Me, I'm predictable. Looking back on shit I've done, you could've probably seen it coming from a mile away. Anyways, still hoping for the best though. My fingers are stiff due to the coldness in my room. 51 degrees, and with these big-ass glass panels in my room (never used as doors, just stupid fucking windows), means less insulation. I'm in my room and my fingers are chilled, what the hell, man. Okay, umm, yeah, break time, hmmm, don't like it. Biology, is kicking my ass right now.
Truthfully, I'm hanging on a thread right now. The only reason I don't have a D+ yet is because of my common sense and logic on tests and quizzes. Today we just looked at our gels, see if we did shit wrong. Our group's looked kinda shitty, couldn't really see anything. It didn't matter, all it mattered was this one solution that was to put into the last slot of the gel. I was unfortunately given that task, wasn't told that it was the most important part. And uhh, I'm guessing I punctured the gel when putting it in there. Huh. If only we were told the importance of it earlier.
Quiz tomorrow by the way. Today, for math, we got back our quizzes, did corrections. One look at my score, I had a "Holy shit," just straight up in my head. 38/78, can you believe it, heh. Most likely the worst score I've ever received. Ever. Got a lot of shit wrong, like a lot. It ain't even 50%, and the class average for this quiz was 63%, heh. Kinda sad to be really, but hey, this is a hard chapter. My classmate, my buddy I guess, I consider him a buddy now actually, stayed after class a bit to help me correct some questions I got wrong. Found out he got the same ones wrong too, so that made me feel a lot better.
He's the dude who asked me anonymously on ask.fm before, last year. Didn't really speak to him much, didn't really pay much attention to him. He's a really cool dude, a trooper, for helping me out. It's Vc, his name's Vc. Sophomore too, by the way. Also asked me advice on classes to take. Umm, lunch was just a bootleg meeting in the theater for Chinese class. US History, we started watching the Lusitania movie, starring that guy from The Mummy. I knew that I needed sleep, because I was falling asleep watching the movie.
The movie was interesting too. My head literally went down once, luckily I don't think people notice, and I always kinda make it look like I'm just transitioning to a more comfortable sitting position. But holy shit, falling asleep in class, and during 5th period, only because there's a movie and the lights are out. Shit, man, this is a worrying trend, heh. And finally, Chinese, where we had Chromebooks to setup and plan a bootleg Google Hangout video group chat, in which we are to record, discuss shit, and turn it in.
We did that about a few hours ago, starting from 9:00 PM. Ended up being an hour long. Looks like the teacher is gonna have to sift through the footage because I ain't gonna edit 1 hour long footage, heh. Also, the teacher's instructions were vague, and she didn't say there was a time limit on the footage. Also the first time she's assigned something like this.
Tomorrow, luckily, there's no mandatory KDT practice, unless you're in Call Me Baby, which I'm not. I'll still show up though, just for the attendance, and get back my scoring sheet for my dances I auditioned. I'd stay an hour though, just so I can focus and finish work there instead of being distracted by shit like the PC in front of me, believe it or not. I can do my work anywhere in any sane condition, but put my PC near me, no work gets done, heh.
And yeah. This has been a nice post, really glad to get all this off after a while. Tomorrow, *sigh*, is an essay for English, along with a take-home essay as well, so, double the hell. I can never really get a break, huh? Same for other people. Maybe, maybe Lt would have some free time to watch a movie this weekend? Hmmm? See, now I'm just thinking too much, heh. We all know she's gonna talk about the essay afterwards. Also, she's explained my voice before when I had mentioned it. Kinda like lacking expression, one voice, and uh, that's true.
Hmmm, the only time I add expression to my voice is when I'm talking to my buddies online through Skype or Curse Voice. Buddies like my best buddy, Ec. Big expression in my voice is reserved for close people. Others, takes me a while to get used to using that type of shit with them. Anyways, too much talking, 2:14 AM, gotta go reclaim what I've lost: sleep. See ya.
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: Don't Flirt - WINNER, Don't Leave - GD&TOP
Holy shit, I went back to look at the career week details (which is next, next week) and saw that on November 20th, there's gonna be a "Professional Gamer/Gaming Industry" coming to visit and talk about their job. I'm like "Daaaamn, I gotta see that. It can either be a pro gamer I know, or Vanderhaar, heh."
So this week, to be honest, I have not been feeling it lately. I haven't even been talking much about Lt because, there's barely anything to talk about. It's sorta dying now, the plot's at a stand-still, no advances, just, shit. Also there's been a ton of work, tests, quizzes, I even received one of my worst scores on a quiz/test that I think I've ever received in my life, heh. If there's one thing I'm grateful for, is the candy that Lt gave me. Bad for my health, yes, but keeps me awake to do shit like, write this.
Psychology, fucking, all I really need to worry about is studying and doing the stupid notes and copying down the answers for the study guide. There's never any homework, projects are just a pain in the ass sometimes (like from the past couple days). Today was just to wrap up presentations, the rest was free time to do shit like study for quotation explications next period.
There's two sides to having my current English teacher. The bad side: he gives a lot of work, a lot of in-depth work, and has high expectations, The good side: if it weren't forme having him as my teacher for 2nd period Honors English, this Lt story arch wouldn't have existed, so there's a definite trade-off there, heh. I didn't really study quotes because it's pretty much impossible to memorize all of 'em. I went to Cliffnotes and Shmoop as my saving graces and studied themes and ways to format my explications. The whole thing was 4 explications, 40 minutes, hand-written. I did not get to finish my 4th explication unfortunately. Fortunately, I'm not the only one.
4 explications with 10 minutes each, I gotta take a minute to remember where it came from, who said, context, etc. Then, plan out what I wanna write about, what theme. Then format and start writing. Really wished we could've typed it, because with the amount of time we're given, it's either quality or penmanship, and I damn well went for quality. Umm, Lt. I'm not sure the direction we're heading to, it's sorta veering off course. When walking to English, she talks about shit that happens in her US History class. After English, she talks about shit that happened in English. And the times that we worked on our poster, she talked about shit OTHER than school.
Definitely an unpredictable person. Me, I'm predictable. Looking back on shit I've done, you could've probably seen it coming from a mile away. Anyways, still hoping for the best though. My fingers are stiff due to the coldness in my room. 51 degrees, and with these big-ass glass panels in my room (never used as doors, just stupid fucking windows), means less insulation. I'm in my room and my fingers are chilled, what the hell, man. Okay, umm, yeah, break time, hmmm, don't like it. Biology, is kicking my ass right now.
Truthfully, I'm hanging on a thread right now. The only reason I don't have a D+ yet is because of my common sense and logic on tests and quizzes. Today we just looked at our gels, see if we did shit wrong. Our group's looked kinda shitty, couldn't really see anything. It didn't matter, all it mattered was this one solution that was to put into the last slot of the gel. I was unfortunately given that task, wasn't told that it was the most important part. And uhh, I'm guessing I punctured the gel when putting it in there. Huh. If only we were told the importance of it earlier.
Quiz tomorrow by the way. Today, for math, we got back our quizzes, did corrections. One look at my score, I had a "Holy shit," just straight up in my head. 38/78, can you believe it, heh. Most likely the worst score I've ever received. Ever. Got a lot of shit wrong, like a lot. It ain't even 50%, and the class average for this quiz was 63%, heh. Kinda sad to be really, but hey, this is a hard chapter. My classmate, my buddy I guess, I consider him a buddy now actually, stayed after class a bit to help me correct some questions I got wrong. Found out he got the same ones wrong too, so that made me feel a lot better.
He's the dude who asked me anonymously on ask.fm before, last year. Didn't really speak to him much, didn't really pay much attention to him. He's a really cool dude, a trooper, for helping me out. It's Vc, his name's Vc. Sophomore too, by the way. Also asked me advice on classes to take. Umm, lunch was just a bootleg meeting in the theater for Chinese class. US History, we started watching the Lusitania movie, starring that guy from The Mummy. I knew that I needed sleep, because I was falling asleep watching the movie.
The movie was interesting too. My head literally went down once, luckily I don't think people notice, and I always kinda make it look like I'm just transitioning to a more comfortable sitting position. But holy shit, falling asleep in class, and during 5th period, only because there's a movie and the lights are out. Shit, man, this is a worrying trend, heh. And finally, Chinese, where we had Chromebooks to setup and plan a bootleg Google Hangout video group chat, in which we are to record, discuss shit, and turn it in.
We did that about a few hours ago, starting from 9:00 PM. Ended up being an hour long. Looks like the teacher is gonna have to sift through the footage because I ain't gonna edit 1 hour long footage, heh. Also, the teacher's instructions were vague, and she didn't say there was a time limit on the footage. Also the first time she's assigned something like this.
Tomorrow, luckily, there's no mandatory KDT practice, unless you're in Call Me Baby, which I'm not. I'll still show up though, just for the attendance, and get back my scoring sheet for my dances I auditioned. I'd stay an hour though, just so I can focus and finish work there instead of being distracted by shit like the PC in front of me, believe it or not. I can do my work anywhere in any sane condition, but put my PC near me, no work gets done, heh.
And yeah. This has been a nice post, really glad to get all this off after a while. Tomorrow, *sigh*, is an essay for English, along with a take-home essay as well, so, double the hell. I can never really get a break, huh? Same for other people. Maybe, maybe Lt would have some free time to watch a movie this weekend? Hmmm? See, now I'm just thinking too much, heh. We all know she's gonna talk about the essay afterwards. Also, she's explained my voice before when I had mentioned it. Kinda like lacking expression, one voice, and uh, that's true.
Hmmm, the only time I add expression to my voice is when I'm talking to my buddies online through Skype or Curse Voice. Buddies like my best buddy, Ec. Big expression in my voice is reserved for close people. Others, takes me a while to get used to using that type of shit with them. Anyways, too much talking, 2:14 AM, gotta go reclaim what I've lost: sleep. See ya.
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Wednesday, November 4, 2015 "It Feels Like I Forgot."
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: Allday Allnight - Jakop, Raina, ￦uNo, DAYDAY
It's been a while. Been a while since I felt like I actually made a real post, and it's only been about 1 post.
It's just that I've been pretty busy, mostly because I'm kinda missing sleep. I went to bed at about 2:50 AM last night, so, yeah, pretty bad. Ummm, I'll keep this one kinda brief as well. I'll definitely do a recap and fill out on stuff that I didn't get the chance to say for, about these past few days, and tomorrow. Just really busy.
Psychology, today we shared our projects in groups, tomorrow is gonna be the same. Yep, nothing really exciting. English, thank goodness today was a review, I actually liked it. The teacher said that quotation explications are supposed to be formulaic, 8 sentences is usually the most you'll need to do a passing explication, we gotta do 4 tomorrow, alrighty. What I'm doubting about it is that I might not remember who said the quote, and the context. Wait, I think it's like part of a passage. That makes it a bit better.
Lt stuff's been on check. By that I mean, not bad, heh. Bio, we continued our experiment with gel electrophoresis, Umm, tomorrow is gonna be review, and then test/ quiz on Friday. Math, was the usual. Lunch, the usual again. US History, more notes. And Chinese, which was just the usual craziness. Friday's gonna be the first practice after auditions, also Black Friday, which, because there's school, I won't be able to go. I will, however, maybe go to the mall on Saturday with my buddies (like Ec) because they're selling shit like, socks for a $1. Ho, ly, shit.
Also, Call of Duty: Black Ops 3 comes out tomorrow. Ah, I remember the days when I dedicated a lot of my time playing it, back in my MW3 days. Good times, good times, But it was middle school, heh. I'll see the player feedback, and then I'll see if I want to buy it yet.
I also dropped the notice to Lt that my birthday is December 5th, and, asked her if she signed up for the SAT yet. She didn't and well, she did after I told her that I was registering, and where so. 54 fucking dollars, man. I haven't even started yet on the studying, heh, give me some sleep and hell yeah I'd do it all. Anyways, I'll be reviewing quotes from the Scarlet Letter for tomorrow's English test (C+, gee thanks). See ya.
EDIT: Oh yeah, did I mention that it's FUCKING, COLD. My fingers are like solid icicles and in my room right now. IT'S 51 DEGREES, holy shit.
Week: 12
Songs to Remember: Allday Allnight - Jakop, Raina, ￦uNo, DAYDAY
It's been a while. Been a while since I felt like I actually made a real post, and it's only been about 1 post.
It's just that I've been pretty busy, mostly because I'm kinda missing sleep. I went to bed at about 2:50 AM last night, so, yeah, pretty bad. Ummm, I'll keep this one kinda brief as well. I'll definitely do a recap and fill out on stuff that I didn't get the chance to say for, about these past few days, and tomorrow. Just really busy.
Psychology, today we shared our projects in groups, tomorrow is gonna be the same. Yep, nothing really exciting. English, thank goodness today was a review, I actually liked it. The teacher said that quotation explications are supposed to be formulaic, 8 sentences is usually the most you'll need to do a passing explication, we gotta do 4 tomorrow, alrighty. What I'm doubting about it is that I might not remember who said the quote, and the context. Wait, I think it's like part of a passage. That makes it a bit better.
Lt stuff's been on check. By that I mean, not bad, heh. Bio, we continued our experiment with gel electrophoresis, Umm, tomorrow is gonna be review, and then test/ quiz on Friday. Math, was the usual. Lunch, the usual again. US History, more notes. And Chinese, which was just the usual craziness. Friday's gonna be the first practice after auditions, also Black Friday, which, because there's school, I won't be able to go. I will, however, maybe go to the mall on Saturday with my buddies (like Ec) because they're selling shit like, socks for a $1. Ho, ly, shit.
Also, Call of Duty: Black Ops 3 comes out tomorrow. Ah, I remember the days when I dedicated a lot of my time playing it, back in my MW3 days. Good times, good times, But it was middle school, heh. I'll see the player feedback, and then I'll see if I want to buy it yet.
I also dropped the notice to Lt that my birthday is December 5th, and, asked her if she signed up for the SAT yet. She didn't and well, she did after I told her that I was registering, and where so. 54 fucking dollars, man. I haven't even started yet on the studying, heh, give me some sleep and hell yeah I'd do it all. Anyways, I'll be reviewing quotes from the Scarlet Letter for tomorrow's English test (C+, gee thanks). See ya.
EDIT: Oh yeah, did I mention that it's FUCKING, COLD. My fingers are like solid icicles and in my room right now. IT'S 51 DEGREES, holy shit.
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